Can I tell you how my love story began? It started with the bitter taste of abandonment in my mouth. The man to whom I was committed walked out my kitchen door and slammed it shut, and seventeen years of marriage abruptly ended. I was wounded and bleeding from my heart, full of self-doubt and grief, shaking in terror at the thought of raising my sons alone.
In that dark and painful moment, my love story truly began. I sensed more than saw Jesus walk in and sit down with me at my kitchen table. I wept and He wept with me. I struggled and He reassured me. I reminded Him of my insecurities, He reminded me that He would be with me. I told Him how weak I really was, He told me that He created galaxies and planets and kept them in orbit. My future, though I could not see farther than the next moment, was secure in His holy hands.
I had been a Christian for many years, but that day I absolutely fell in love with my God. He was not some distant deity that I had to approach though ritual or perfect behaviors. He was closer than my breath, and even knowing me completely, He still loved me with steadfast, fiery passion.
I would love to tell you that God snapped His fingers and healed my wounded soul instantly. He didn’t. Instead, He came and fellowshipped with me over and over, whispering love and revealing Himself to me through His word. Slowly, I was healed by the oil of His presence being poured into my life repeatedly until my heart stopped aching and my smile became real again.
There is a peculiar sweetness to be found in an intimate relationship with the Lord that will ruin a person for lesser delights. The God Who meets us in our brokenness is worth far more than any passing interest that could catch our eye with its glittering promises. Our souls were made to love Him. The poetic cadence in the Song of Solomon lends words to the passion of this most intimate of yearnings. The maiden whispers her words of love:
Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth! For your love is better than wine! (Song 1:2)
As we journey into this deep relationship with God, His words become kisses–tokens of His love for us. The pages of scripture begin to yield unveiled glimpses of the heart of God. We see emotions that are higher and deeper than we can fathom.
We witness Him yearning for fellowship with Adam in a garden only to be heartbroken at man’s betrayal and separation from Him. We discover a God Who grieves over sin and the pollution of the heart of men as He sends judgment on Noah’s world. We watch as He steps into the dust and leans into the friendship of Abraham, lingering to discuss His purposes and plans as He looks toward Sodom. We listen as He thunders His glory from Sinai, declaring His name to Moses. We witness His compassion as He walks the dusty streets of Israel healing lepers and feeding the hungry crowds. We behold love that is breathtaking as He shoulders our sin and allows Roman soldiers to nail them and Himself on a cross. (Just in case I was unclear, I really am saying that Jesus is God.) His words become kisses as He breathes life into the written scriptures for us.
The longer we walk with Him, the more we will realize that His love for us is far better than any pleasure that this world can offer us. The wine of worldly temptations is far less tempting once we have tasted the superior pleasure of God’s affections. Even those things that our society labels blessings are less intoxicating than the joy of knowing Him in a deeper, fuller way. His love is better than wine.
David the psalmist knew it. He wrote: The secret [of the sweet, satisfying companionship] of the Lord have they who fear (revere and worship) Him, and He will show them His covenant and reveal to them its [deep, inner] meaning. (Psalms 25:14)
Moses knew it. He cried out in the wilderness, “If Your Presence does not go with us, do not bring us up from here.” He knew that it was better to stay in the dry, barren wilderness with God than to enter into a promised land of plenty without Him. (Exodus 33:15)
Paul knew it. He prayed that the first century believers “may have the power and be strong to apprehend and grasp with all the saints [the experience of that love] what is the breadth and length and height and depth [of it];[That you may really come] to know [practically, through experience for yourselves] the love of Christ, which far surpasses mere knowledge [without experience]” (Ephesians 3:18-19)
And let me be bold enough to confess to you, I know it too. He has proven His love for me over and over in my prayer closet and in my devotional time. He has kept me every step of my journey. I am my Beloved’s, and He is mine. (Song 6:3)
Jesus loves me. This is my love story.
Pray with me?
Lord, we love You, but we want to love You more. We want to experience Your love and to fellowship with You in deep and intimate ways. Sometimes our lives are so busy and cluttered with things that will not matter when we stand before You. We ask for you to draw us away from our distractions. Draw us to Yourself. Write our love story with You.
